Can a narcissistic husband change?

Change is possible in theory, but it requires the narcissistic partner to genuinely acknowledge the problem, pursue consistent long-term therapy, and tolerate the discomfort of accountability without the promise of reward. This is rare, and it is important not to base decisions on the hope of change rather than the reality of current behavior.

Is my husband a narcissist or just emotionally immature?

The distinction matters less than the impact. Whether the behavior stems from narcissistic personality disorder, emotional immaturity, or unresolved trauma, the harm still exists. What matters is how you are being treated and what you need, not the diagnostic label.

What is the difference between narcissistic abuse and normal relationship conflict?

Normal conflict involves two people who both feel hurt and are willing to take some responsibility. Narcissistic abuse involves a persistent pattern where one person’s reality is consistently dismissed, their emotions are used against them, and accountability is not genuinely accepted.

Why do I keep making excuses for his behavior?

This is a common experience in these relationships and does not indicate weakness. Cognitive dissonance, trauma bonding, and cycles of intense affection followed by mistreatment can create strong psychological attachment. Understanding this helps build self-compassion rather than self-blame.

Should I try couples therapy with a narcissistic husband?

Many trauma-informed therapists advise against starting with couples therapy when narcissistic abuse is present. Individual therapy with a professional experienced in betrayal trauma and coercive control is generally a safer and more effective first step.

healing through embodiment Archives

Why Sallie Still Inspires Me… an Incredible Journey of Healing through the Body

When Sallie first reached out to me to ask me if I thought The Lifehouse Body & Soul Practice could help her, I told her “Absolutely.”

Sallie had lost her husband a year earlier to cancer, leaving her a widow and single mother to four children. She was making her way, involved in support groups, and recently remarried to a wonderful man who’d also lost his wife to cancer.

With a now-blended family of eight kids, Sallie had so much to live for and so many reasons to get herself back to where she was fully functioning.

But even with all the efforts she’d made, she felt that there was still healing that needed to happen. She bravely showed up to Practice at Lifehouse Body & Soul.

Sallie was a natural with group exercise. She was strong, beautiful, and physically fit, and she attacked our challenging morning workouts with energy.

It was the second half of class, the part of class where we slow things down, breathe, stretch, feel our bodies, and create space for our emotions to process, where Sallie struggled at first.

I’ll never forget the first classes where I witnessed Sallie’s entire body clench up: her shoulders tight, her hips refusing to let go, her breath caught in her chest, afraid to release all that her body had been carrying for the past months. Tears overflowed and the intensity was almost too much for her to bear.

Sallie would text me after Practice, “I feel so much emotion, there’s so much coming up for me. Is this normal?” she would ask.

“Yes, it is. You’ve experienced a life-altering trauma, and your body is holding onto all that pain, all that fear. Unfortunately, if you really want to heal, you can’t go over it, under it, or around. You’re going to have to go through. And you’re strong enough to do it, here….with all of us holding you up. You’re not alone.”

I knew this because I had moved through my own grief. I had felt the same resistance. I encouraged her to keep coming, and Sallie did, so bravely, so consistently.

It wasn’t long before Sallie’s body stopped fighting. Practice classes gave her the opportunity to keep softening, keep listening, keep surrendering to the emotions that had gotten stuck when life had forced her into survival mode.

She came to our Mindful Living Course classes devotedly and learned a whole new vocabulary to match the organic process she was experiencing through her body.

Mantras like “Thy will, not mine, be done,” “There is room for this, too,” and “I can’t, He can, and I will let Him,” became life rafts in the turbulent sea of her healing.

Over time, it was a sacred privilege to witness Sallie transform, to watch her body literally heal from the hard-wired trauma responses that had become an unwelcome override to her operating system.

Sallie became one of our most dedicated students, crediting the mindfulness tools and sacred space of love and acceptance in this community for her miraculous healing journey through the darkness of her profound grief, giving her the tools to propel herself towards a bright future.

At Lifehouse Body & Soul, we don’t have any magic wands nor do we profess a systematic strategy guaranteed to fix all your problems.

In our experience, that’s just not how deep, spiritual healing works.

We simply offer the grounded, intuitive, and time-tested tools and compassionate framework that can help you find yourself: mind, body, and spirit.

We teach self-reflection: how to observe without judgment. How to respond with love. How to allow discomfort without resisting it. How to trust that you really are big enough to hold pain and uncertainty and deeply know that you will never be asked to do it alone.

The most surprising thing for so many people to realize is that everything they were looking for all along, is already right here, within them, exactly as they are.

People like Sallie become true, spiritual friends; fellow travelers on a lifetime journey of personal growth.

If you or someone you know is interested in a soul-level transformation to heal what is still not yet aligned in your heart or bodily tissues, we’d love to work with you. With consistent practice, an open mind, and a willing heart, there is nothing that cannot be healed.

A free consultation can help you understand which of our programs might be the best fit for you. We would love nothing more than to help you find the joy and inner freedom you were born for.

We’re so grateful to Sallie for being part of our Body & Soul family and allowing us to share her story.

With Love & Gratitude,

Becky

Confronting Body Shame: Do you treasure your body as your most loyal friend?

Do you treasure your body as your most loyal friend?

This is something I had never considered before I experienced my own life-changing journey of trauma recovery and emotional healing.

Ten years ago, I was a busy mom of four. I volunteered a lot of hours at church and worked part-time as a certified Fitness Instructor and Aerobics Program Coordinator at two local universities (BYU & UVU).

My main worry as far as my body was concerned was managing it, and I was a harsh taskmaster. I was focused on staying in shape, maintaining my ideal weight, and performing all the tasks required of me in my various responsibilities.

When I experienced a life-changing trauma in my marriage, my body suddenly seemed to become my enemy. I couldn’t sleep, eat, or even function. I would spin into anxiety and panic attacks and was often completely overwhelmed by emotions I couldn’t control.

During this very difficult time, I slowly learned to develop an entirely different mind-body relationship with my body: a compassionate relationship of listening, honoring, and trusting.

Now, ten years later, I spend my life helping others to experience the same transformational shifts that allowed me to heal in ways I could never have predicted.

In order to change our relationship to our bodies, we have to understand a few basic truths:

Your body is hard-wired to survive: it constantly reads your surroundings and responds in ways it unconsciously believes will keep you safe – this is your nervous system’s stress response.
Your body is like a container: it holds every experience, emotion, memory, impression in its tissues and stores it until you give it permission to let go – a process known as somatic release.
You are not your body. You are not your mind. You are the soul inside who is able to observe your thoughts and emotions and choose which to follow and which to release – the foundation of mindful self-awareness.

Mindfulness practices, embodiment, and guided meditation can help us connect with the soul inside, bringing wisdom, clarity, and compassion to all the thoughts, emotions, and sensations of this holistic human experience.

If you could use a fresh start in your mind-body connection and relationship with your body, we’d love to have you join us at our somatic embodiment classes, where we work out hard, practice restorative yoga, and meditate.

Even coming once per week can make such a difference in how you feel on a daily basis. If you feel curious, come check it out! You’ve got nothing to lose but a lot of self-loathing.

Learn more about the Undone Academy here.

Help You Heal From Trauma

In fact, it opens us up to a very specific and powerful toolkit to more skillfully and accountably address what’s actually happening.

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Frequently Asked Questions –

Q1: What is the mind-body connection and why does it matter for trauma recovery?

The mind-body connection refers to how our mental and emotional states directly influence physical health. In trauma recovery, understanding this link helps people recognize how stored stress and unresolved emotions manifest as physical symptoms – and how somatic practices can support healing.

Q2: What are embodiment classes and what can I expect from them?

Embodiment classes combine movement, breathwork, yoga, and meditation to help you reconnect with your physical body in a mindful way. They are designed for people at all fitness levels who want to reduce stress, process emotions, and build a healthier relationship with themselves.

Q3: How does trauma get stored in the body?

Trauma can become “trapped” in the body’s nervous system and muscle tissue as unprocessed emotional memory. Somatic therapies and mindful movement practices help the body safely release this stored tension, reducing symptoms like anxiety, panic attacks, and chronic stress.

Q4: Can yoga and meditation help with anxiety and panic attacks?

Yes. Regular yoga and meditation practice has been shown to calm the nervous system, lower cortisol levels, and improve emotional regulation – all of which reduce the frequency and intensity of anxiety and panic attacks over time.

Q5: How often should I attend embodiment or mindfulness classes to see results?

Even attending once per week can create noticeable shifts in mood, stress levels, and body awareness. Consistency matters more than frequency – showing up regularly, even briefly, builds the mind-body awareness needed for lasting emotional and physical wellbeing.